Sometimes the trials of life can become overwhelming and the load may seem to heavy to bear. It’s very easy to get weighed down by the trials of life.  One thing I have learned is that, in this life you can’t expect for others to make you happy.  This is what it is so important to have an internal sense of self worth and an intrinsic sense of peace that you carry within yourself. As you continue to live and grow, the circumstances of life, and having to deal with people will teach you this.

The bottoms line is this, you should never have to force someone to like you, or love you.  Why force someone to be with you, or share your space if that is not what they really want. When someone has a desire to be with you, to love you, and to spend their time with you, you will know it.  That feeling or thought of loneliness can cause one to do desperate things and make really unhappy decisions.  

So I say to anyone that may be feeling lonely or alone in this season of your life, just know for yourself that you are not alone, and that you can be and feel fulfilled if you just learn to love yourself.

Love comes when you are able to stop looking to others to fulfill your need.  Love is about feeling a sense of security in knowing who you are and what matters most.  Love is not envious, boastful or jealous, but it’s patient caring, and kind.  Love is what you do more-so that what you feel. If you can’t do anything else, I implore you to start working on self love today.  You can Love yourself first and take the Love of God with you. 

So what is self love?  Self-love occurs when you can treat yourself with the same kindness, concern, and support you would show to a friend. Stop looking to others, or expecting others to be for you what they are unable to be, and  start being what you can be, to yourself. Find what makes you happy and become one with it. Remember, your happiness should not be predicated on the presence of another person, or what that person can give to you, or do for you.

This is one of life lesson that I had to learn for myself. Im so glad I learned this principal as it has made my life better.  Now that I truly understand the importance of self love, I want to share it with you.  I pray for any one who is reading this, that you will be able to let go of chasing expectations and release any negative thoughts that captivates your mind. I hope that you find some inspiration in this passage and that it will give you peace to move forward and create your own happiness.

~Angel 6/2018~

Dreams are important but don’t lose yourself chasing your dream.  I know for a fact how important it is to be able to birth that idea or gift that has been placed inside of you.  Sometimes it becomes so overwhelming that you just don’t know what to do.  It's like, when you look around, all you see is everyone else excelling. It appears to be that everyone else is becoming what they’ve set out to be. 

This perception that you hold of other's success begins to make you think that you're falling behind, and before you know it, you start feeling lost and confused and wondering what has happened to you.  What I've learned is that if you ponder in those thoughts long enough, you’ll begin to feel hopeless and in despair, and ultimately you’ll start contemplating abandoning your dreams.

Just because you see it, doesn’t mean you have to be it.  Well, be it, right now that is.  Everything happens for a reason, and as the Bible teaches us, there is a time and season for everything under the sun.  You’ve got to Know when it’s your time to move, and when it's your time to just stand still.  You can’t live another persons life, or walk another persons walk.  You have to move to the beat of your own drum.  You must concentrate on staying in your lane, riding your ride, and keeping your stride.  Your story is yours, and your life belongs to you.

So, here’s my advice. Look at your life like you're telling us a story.  You're experiences are the pages in the book and each chapter has its' own purpose and it's own meaning.  Each chapter in the book are a compilation of plots with a larger story to tell.  The story of your life is building up to a culminating end, but like every thing in life, there are phases and stages of growth and development that it must go through. This is the process of your life, and it's your story to tell.

Lastly, as you move forward, understand that you do have choices.  You can drown in your own thoughts, sink in your words or die by destruction due to your untimely actions.  Or you can climb the ladder of success by working the process, keeping the faith and never losing hope. Don’t let former one become you.  This is your life, and your story to tell!  Do it your way!

~Angel 5/2018~

Don’t be reactive but be a conscientious thinker. Your future and your destiny is determined by how you think. I believe that we were place here on this earth to fulfill a destined purpose. Have you discovered what your purpose for being is and what gifts and talents your were given to help fulfill that purpose?

I believe that we have been given our own unique gifts and talents. Some people know what their gifts and talents are and they have claimed it to be rightfully so. While there are others who have not made that discovery as of yet. Are you one of those who have not yet tapped into what you were naturally created to do?

My understanding of a gift is when someone gives you something just because they want too. There’s nothing you did to earn the gift. It was given to you freely. Gifts are given because the gift giver wants to give you something they believe you should have. That’s what makes it a gift.

You always have a choice to either receive the gift, or decline it. In my experience, when someone gives you a gift, you’ll generally accepts it. Not only do you accept the gift, but you become extremely anxious about unveiling the gift to find out what it is. I said all that to say, have you accepted the gift that has been given to you? If you haven’t already done so, I challenge you, to dig deep inside yourself to unveil what gifts has been placed in you.

Know that the gifts and talents you have can only help you move forward into your destiny. It’s those gifts and talents that help us to become who were were truly meant to be. Upon learning about what gifts and talents you naturally have, don’t waste it in doing nothing. There are people who lives can be influenced, renewed and changed as a result of the gift and talents that lies within you.

Yes, this is true, what you have inside of you, was meant to be shared with others in such as way that they too can begin to enact their talents and help others become better too. I live by the motto, “Building Better Lives and Inspiring Hope for tomorrow.”

If I inspired one, and give hope to another then I did what I was created to do. Have you used your gifts and talents today? Will you make a difference in the life of another by sharing what you do naturally and well? I surely hope so. If not I encourage you to join me as I continue my mission to, “Build Better Lives and Inspire Hope for tomorrow.”

I keep finding myself going through transitions. From one stop to the next, and sometimes I feel like giving up. I know that I’ve worked hard to get to where I am in life but when I see the challenges that lie ahead, it’s easy to start doubting myself.

But who would have thought five years ago that I’d be sitting here at this very moment, thinking an operating as a business owner and entrepreneur. I always knew that I had it in me, but five years ago this task seemed to be out of my reach. Nevertheless I made it here, and I’m three years in.

So in light of all that I may be feeling or even experiencing right now, it’s just another phase in the growth and development process. I know some people are thinking as they read this, “Why be afraid?” “Fear is not good and you should not speak it into existence,” but I say to you, “Much like Anger, Fear is relevant, and it can be a positive emotion, if it’s processed appropriately.”

I guess you’re wondering why would I even say that “Fear is relevant?” Well, it’s quite simple. For me, I see fear as being motivational, a form of protection, and a source of guidance. When I’m place in a position that I feel like “I can’t,” or “I’m afraid too,” Fear prompts me to overcome it, just to prove that I can and I’m very capable. Yes, I’ve turn what could have been an immobilizing disaster, into an positive, self motivating factor. So the way I see it, Fear is relevant and it has a place in my success, and here’s how:

1. Fear motivates you: Instead of retreating, Fear has a way of pushing you forward and it dares you to believe. No more staying stuck and feeling intimidated by what you thought you could not do. Let your Fear motivate you, and prove to yourself that you are more than capable, and that you can do, what you thought was not even possible.

2. Fear protects: It puts you in a position to be vigilant, on alert, and self aware at all time. It helps you to take a look at things from all angles, and it prompts you to be conscientious about the choices and decisions you have to make.

3. Fear Guides you: It compels you to think and process before reacting to any situation. It informs you about the choices you make, and makes you aware of the consequence (positive and negative) that can impact future. It helps you to think critically through each step you take, as you recognize that where your headed, is on a journey that will change your life forever.

When you’re looking to grow professionally and develop into what you know you could be, and when your working hard to read your maximum potential, just know that you will experience moments where fear will creep in. But I say to you, that’s ok. Remember, Fear has a place and it’s relevant in the growth and development process. How you process and navigate through your fear, will determine the outcome you’ll experience. Fear could immobilize you, or catapult you into becoming the best version of yourself, imaginable. I say execute the power of Fear and let it motive you, protect you, and guide you into your destiny.

Bridgette N Montgomery
​MSW LCSW MSNPM CSOTS